Here Are Tips For Forgetting Your Troubles
1. Shove the thought away. When you are reminded
of something you don’t want to think about, just refuse to go there.
Let your mind go blank rather than allowing it to make the connection.
Sound ridiculously simple? Research shows that many, if not most, of us
can will ourselves to forget in this way. The engine of such suppression
is your prefrontal cortex—the same region of the brain that puts brakes
on inappropriate actions. But just as some people are better at
blocking bad behavior than others, some are more proficient at memory
suppression than others. If you turn out to have loose reins on your
brain, you might need to practice or to use one of the other
tricks.
2. Push it back again—and again. If you want to
boost your chances of forgetting something for good, shove it out of
consciousness on a daily basis. In a month, it might be gone, if modern
psychology experiments are any guide. (Freud argued that such repressed
memories would come back to haunt us, but the jury is still out on this
idea.) Over a longer period, practicing this mental block might hone
your skill. People who have had to frequently block a traumatic
memory—loss of a parent, say, or their house burning down—to prevent it
from overwhelming them score higher on tests of memory suppression than
do people who have been lucky enough to have avoided significant
suffering. One explanation for this result is that practicing
suppression over the years makes you better at it.
3. Think of something else. Rather than just
willing an upsetting memory into the dustbin, replace it with a nicer
idea. So if seeing a Hawaiian lei reminds you of your ex drunk at a
party, try to link the lei with images of a sandy beach instead. People
who struggle to block memories—a group that usually includes people who
tend toward rumination or who suffer from depression—have more success
forgetting unwanted recollections if they find good substitutes for what
they want to put out of their minds.
4. Prepare for shutdown. Thinking about the need
to block associations ahead of time can boost your ability to do just
that. Even a second of advance warning can give your brain added
inhibitory power, research suggests. So if you have to see someone who
you think might bring back a difficult period in your life, tell
yourself before the date that you’ll be halting these thoughts before
they reach consciousness. The mental barricades you erect will be
sturdier with a little advance notice.
5. Just do it. When you sense a reminder of
something bad coming on, do something to distract you. Anything. Pick up
the phone. Walk around the block. Stomp your foot. Say hello to a
passerby. In one study, scientists found that pressing an enter key at
the moment of recall triggered forgetting.
6. Study. If your mind is awash in clutter, one
of the best ways to clear it out is to reinforce what you do want to
keep. When you study particular information, to learn it better, you
automatically forget closely related material. This phenomenon, called
retrieval-induced forgetting, efficiently tidies your mental closet.
7. See it another way. Sometimes we are upset
because we are interpreting a particular situation in the worst possible
light. If you can find way to see the same experience more positively,
you may be inadvertently inducing forgetting. That is, by reinforcing
the positive you are automatically toning down the negative in your
mind.
8. Walk through a doorway. Remarkably, this simple act closes the door on what happened just before.
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